I can't do anything right. I don't know how to appreciate. I take and don't give. I know my tears doesn't mean a thing anymore.

grey's

"Stop, i do not need rescuing. I'm a surgeon. I do the rescuing. You are not my knight in shining..whatever. You're everywhere. All the time. Saying things!"

"This is the happily ever after part. And in this happily ever after part, the guy is there all the time, saying things. And the girls love it!"

"Just go to work. I'll see you there."

"Just for the record.. I am your knight in shining..whatever."

Bully free

I always pray for a stronger heart. Stronger mind. To not get easily hurt by simple words or actions. Because i know i am sensitive. I know i can easily be affected by someone else. But i'm no longer going to let something get in my way of me being who i trully am. To not let me achieve my goals. If i want to do something, i will do it. Even if i cry, i am not weak. Even if i care too much for others, i shall now learn to prioritize myself. I am not selfish, i am just seeing things in a new way for my own good. 

I think it's about time. 

Clueless

Note to self:

Caring too much may be an issue. When you care for someone so much, sometimes you neglect your own problems. Don't interfere with someone else's problems unless they allow you to. Solve your own problems first. You'll save a lot of unnecessary tears.

Always trying to make others feel happy and better about themselves, but you often forget to ensure that you are happy first. That's the problem right there. But what if that person means the world to you?

gap

I wonder if i am doing all the right things, saying the right words, behaving the right way.

mock exam

MY TRIAL STARTS TOMORROWWWW AND IT HAD TO BE PHYSICS FIRST OMG

ENGLISH ON MONDAAYAYAYAYYYY THEN ORAL ON TUESDAYYYY WITH SOME AUSSIE GUYYY

Then one week of much needed break :)

THEN THREE MORE SUBJECTS TO GOOOOO BIO CHEM MATHHHHH



Wishing myself all the best.

sleepless

I feel so low. So damn low. 

plan abcd

I can't believe i'm going to graduate from college soon.. My programme is not even for a year! Trials are coming soon.. next Thursday actually. Then i have a week off due to oral exams and then back to trials for the remaining 4 subjects after Physics on next Thurs. I just hope to do the best i can because so far.. i've applied to.. quite a number of universities.

Abroad (undergraduate):
1. Western Sydney University
2. University of New South Wales
3. University of Tasmania
4. Monash University (Clayton)
5. James Cook University

Local (undergraduate):
1. International Medical University

Still waiting for application forms for 2014 intake (undergraduate):
1. Penang Medical College (local)
2. Perdana University (local)
3. Royal College of Surgeons Ireland (abroad)

Basically.. i am just keeping my options open. To me, i really don't mind where i'm going to as long as i get to do what i want to study. Local or abroad, it's about how well you can achieve something. Australia universities' requirements are super high so i'm not putting my hopes too high for it but i've done all the applications.. now just wait for an offer and finish up my IELTS. Local Uni's requirement is surprisingly high too!! So.. if all else fails.. i'll probably do Bachelors in Biomedicine and then do my MBBS as a graduate. Meaning.. at the end of the day.. i'll have two qualifications.. Which is actually.. quite impressive! But.. takes super duper hard work to go through two stages of it. I just pray to God everyday to ease my application process and to be able to continue studying.

If i do go abroad, I'll miss my family, opah, nenek, besties, friends and of course.. this guy. ♥